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January 10, 2010: “Looking Ahead: Future Church”

A man sought medical aid because he had popped eyes and a ringing in the ears. A doctor looked him over and suggested removal of his tonsils. The operation resulted in no improvement, so the patient consulted another doctor who suggested removal of his teeth. The teeth were extracted, but still the man’s eyes popped and the ringing in his ears continued.…

January 4, 2009: “Carpe Diem, Manana”

Predictions: David Sarnoff wanted some of his associates to invest in the radio in the 1920s; the response supposedly: “The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?” — “Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value.”– Marshall Ferdinand Foch, professor of strategy, Ecole Superieure de Guerre Horse drawn carriages…

December 7, 2008: “When Its Hard For Your Child To Be Good; And Santa Claus Is Coming to Town”

In a copy of a family -type magazine (TODAY’S CHRISTIAN WOMAN)-came this story and to fully understand it, you have to know that Barney is a purple dinosaur on children’s young programming who is always singing about how much he loves us. SO that told….” A woman took her four-year-old granddaughter to the doctor’s office with a fever. The doctor looked in…

November 23, 2008: “A Thank You Note to the Universe, Intergenerational Thanksgiving Sunday”

‘Twas the Night of Thanksgiving, But I just couldn’t sleep.I tried counting backwards,I tried counting sheep.The leftovers beckonedThe dark meat and white,But I fought the temptationWith all of my might.Tossing and turningWith anticipation,The thought of a snackBecame infatuation.So I raced to the kitchen,Flung open the door,And gazed in the fridgeFull of goodies galore.I gobbled up turkeyAnd buttered potatoes,Pickles and carrots,Beans and tomatoes.I…

November 16, 2008: “Why the Pilgrims Became Unitarians”

This joke is not part of sermon and was not told from the pulpit! One sunny day in January, 2009 an old man approached the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue, where he’d been sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the U.S. Marine standing guard and said, ‘I would like to go in and meet with President Bush.’The Marine looked…

November 9, 2008: “When the Holidays Hurt”

There was once a young Unitarian Universalist child who was dining with parents at the home for the first time of an elderly great uncle, who was known to be very religious. Just before they started eating, after watching the old man bow his head and speak in a soft voice, the young Unitarian Universalist asked, Mom, what did Uncle Bob say…

November 2, 2008: “Why We Still Worship the Ancestors”

Some Halloween humor: A squad car driver was covering a quiet beat out in the sticks when he was amazed to find a former lieutenant on the police force covering the beat. He stopped the car and asked, “Why, Mike, this wouldn’t be your new beat out here in the sticks, would it?” From a book called Children’s Letters to God, compiled…